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Locating Yourself

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Locat­ing Your­self  —  most define them­selves using lists. You just might be, only, what you enact. Let’s look at the ways we cat­e­go­rize our­selves  —  and pro­pose an alter­na­tive. When asked about Locat­ing Your­self  —  asked the ques­tion “Who are you?” most peo­ple rhyme off a list. They start with where they belong, and give you their

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Being a Mirror

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Being a Mir­ror is all about help­ing oth­ers to hear them­selves by reflect­ing back, with­out judge­ment. I sus­pect that the rea­son that most cou­ples have prob­lems with com­mu­ni­ca­tion is that they have grown up wit­ness­ing poor com­mu­ni­ca­tion.  So let me define a few things that good com­mu­ni­ca­tion is not. Good com­mu­ni­ca­tion is not: Good com­mu­ni­ca­tion is: Most

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Things Change When You Do

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Things Change When You Do  —  this is about is how we deal with events that seem larg­er than life.  Typ­i­cal­ly, these events are cat­e­go­rized as “This is not fair!”  Gath­ered under this umbrel­la are things like death, ill­ness, acci­dents, glob­al cat­a­stro­phes, abuse, and the like. Dar­bel­la and I once led a sem­i­nar. One of the par­tic­i­pants was

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